Alright, well... last week my whole life plan changed within an hour.Sure it was a little bit of a let down, but ultimately I just feel okay. Like a big mess was cleaned up with a "No." and some teary eyes in a school office. So I relayed the news to my dad of every door I've ever had in mind completely closing.. but that I think I've found a cracked window. & that I'm gonna climb out that window unless it shuts and maybe some vent opens up or something. Coupled with some down-to-earth wisdom(including a few choice words to spice it up a bit), he opened my blinds and curtains and starting plotting out how to rearrange or paint my room, or both .. because acording to him, and maybe to me too, "I need some kind of drastic change." It was precious, to say the least. So this secret over here really caught my eye.
& maybe I just will paint my room.. or something like that.
On a separate note, tonight I watched the movie Sunshine Cleaning with Amy Adams and Emily Blunt. Whether it's worthy of being written about or not- something in me kind of loved it.. Though a few parts were left unresolved and ultimately it was a pretty mediocre film, it really tugged on my heart. It gave me heavy boots & almost had me in tears a couple times, but throughout the whole thing I kept remembering how I truly do believe- absolutely and without a doubt- that there is the most beauty & strength in flaws and disfunction. And that a life that's handled roughly is so, so incredibly beautiful at it's high points.
Maybe it's because when you're dealt unpleasant cards, the happy one means a little bit more to you. Shines a whole lot brighter because it was so longed for and you remember the other older, wrinkly cards that made you want it so badly. And in turn, you shine some kind of beautifully radiant light all over everyone around you.